Unsettle Emotions- A Clash of Beliefs between the Modern and the Conventional

Gosh! I felt super guilt-ridden now. My siblings are both caught up with chicken pox, with me being their primary source of infection. Their symptoms are much more severe than mine, esp my bro as he really looks like he is infected with small pox. His whole face is lined with big angry red swollen poxes. There was hardly any space left in between each pox. The degree of the itchy sensation faced by them seems to be so much unbearable than mine. The itchiness was so significant that it drained their ability to go into a sleep.

Last night, i woke up at about 3 plus in the morning after being bitten continuously by that particular greedy and irritating god-damn mosquito. I heard my sis moaning and wincing at the itchiness. My bro was up sitting near the living room as besides enduring the tormenting itchiness, he felt super warm to fall asleep. This duration lasted for about 3 hrs before i know that i was drifting into a light sleep.

Though i experienced before this kind of torturous "rather be death than alive" moment, i don't ever remember that the duration was so long. I could recount that it was one dark night, while i was suddenly awaken by this surge of sharp itchiness biting my back. Being alone in my room, with curtains drawn up, layers of light shining from the corridors of the flat next to my block peacefully in the silent night, i twitched and twisted my body on the bed trying my best to curb the itchiness away. Muttering inaudibly soft prayers, i managed to push myself up into a sitting position, grabbing the tail of the rear of my t-shirt, i fanned myself frantically trying to alleviate the itchiness of my back and to distract myself from the cues of itchiness coming from other parts of me like the scalp and the thighs. Then out of no where there was this light breeze that came sweeping in between my bedroom windows, right onto my back. A chilling shiver was sent down my spine immediately, stumbling me down onto the bed. By then, besides moaning, i was already sobbing silently, wondering how long the night is, praying for the night to dissipate as soon as possible and pleading for more strength to tide me through the whole process before falling asleep. Perhaps the sobbing helped to relief me indirectly in a way to channel some of the energy into the tears to ease off the tight emotional stress forming and also the brain from concentrating on the niggling itchiness of the skin. Anyway, i am really grateful that now i am freed from all the stinging and the urge to scratch like mad.

Apparently, its seems that the medicine prescribed by the doc for my bro case was not working that effective for him since we both consulted the same doc. But i also suspect that the reason why my condition is less serious is because mine was rather controlled as i did took some antibiotics initially because at that point of time, i m also having 3 big ulcers around my tonsils while the doc still cannot confirm the diagnosis. I m not sure whether was it a strep throat or not, but i do believe that this was a reason why mine differ much from theirs.

On the other hand, my sis's doc prescribed her a slightly different set of medicine. It was just an anti-viral drug, Acyclovir, that is also able to curb the itchiness away and was to be consumed within the 24 to 48 hours of the onset of the rash . The quantities of the antibiotics is rather huge dosage. However, she didn't take it as my mum kept insisting that she shouldn't take it and should let all thew poxes popped out naturally. Maybe that's why my siblings symptoms and conditions are more similar than to mine as my mom also requested the doc not to control the viral growth.

I am totally on the opposite side of my mom's belief. There were people who died of chicken pox and among these deaths, most of them were adults above 20. The condition of adults down with chicken pox is much more acute than children thus it is normal for adults to be administered with stronger dose of medication to stablise the condition.

Besides, i also felt skeptical about some of the concepts based on her theory that was passed down by generations of ancestors related to chicken pox. I could smell out the loopholes in some of the flawed logic as it truly doesn't make much senses, scientifically. With modern technology and recent research and developments, it is understandable that anti-viral drugs, antibiotics and any forms of medicine are aim to reduce the sufferings. If things and solutions were to always remain as the old way, i think people are still probably living in craves today.

Here's a few of some of the flawed logic which i still couldn't quite fathom. If anyone has an answer, do kindly enlightened me by dropping in a comment to help me out as i m now being brandished as the ignorant brat with a thick skull who "still doesn't get it what's good for her". In the meantime, the docs had assured us that its alright to consume any thing as long as you maintain a well-balanced diet.

1) Abstain from chicken, eggs and seafood, but its ok to consume fish.

Is it because the name of chicken pox, there's why it is related to chicken and we should abstain from eating? I thought chicken and eggs are one of the protein-rich food providers to aid to speed up recoveries? Der! fish came from the sea, what makes it different from the rest?

2) Must not consume any beans-related products like beancurd, almond, bean-sprout but is ok to eat long beans, lentils, string beans.

What's the difference??? Both have fibers and are sources of natural complementary protein food?

3) Abstain from any dark soya sauce but its ok to consume light soya sauce.

Is it because of the rumors that scars will turn black after consuming dark soya sauce? Really?

4) Must not drink anything that is cold.

Huh? Why?

5) Take a pepper bath to relieve the itchiness.

I thought i read sth online that its to take an oatmeal bath to sooth the itchiness?

P.S: I really hate chicken pox!!!!

Hitherto...

I have still yet to...

Complete reading all my novels

Go to the bank to apply for my atm car

Collect my bi-weekly contacts

Get into the mood of a studious student to do the reading of the basic stuff and info from the small pile of notes from Singtel

BUT...

I had deviated from my dad's strict diet discreetly... by munching on a few packets of oreo cookies, a handful of nougats and 1 piece of sweet-stew beancurd during dinner tonight....

I can't do without the "normal" snacking and diet that i usually have... If there's one thing that i cant live without it, that will surely be tasty food (not shuai ge)... be it healthy or trashy... that's why i never succeed in any endeavours made to go on diet... that's why i give up trying to be as thin as my sis, erika...

Haha... i m jus feeling a bit bored at home now...

My 2 weeks MC

Can you imagine how depressing the situation is if you are down with chicken pox, together with a bad score throat, at the start of a new menses cycle in the beginning of a new year?

Fucking hell! That's really terrible!

Yea, i happened to be the above joker who is granted a full 2 weeks leave before i had to report back to work on next fri, 23 Jan.

Last week, after the prelude of 3 torturous days of fever and body ache, a full blown chicken poxes stride up with nasty ugly scary swollen angry red poxes popping up swiftly on my face and body, esp at my back. The fever had yet to be subsidised completely while the itchy sensation crept up and twitch onto my skin. The itchiness was simply unbearable!!!

I was super depressed and upset for the first few days because this was really not the right time to fall sick and take sick leave as i just landed myself a temp job. I was afraid that Singtel would terminate my contract and that my agency might charge me for breaching the contract. Furthermore, i felt and looked like a freak who was emitting out contagious virus to people. I also fear that i might jeopardised my sis's long awaited trip to Cape Town.

And thanks to my bro, YS, who is not making anything better by shunning away from my presence, refusal to sit on the same dining table to have dinner while i was having mine, covering his face with his shirt or blocking his nose with his fingers to breathe in any contagious air and walking away quickly when he felt that he was physically too near to me for his own good! He said that it was better to take precautions as he had no wish to be struck by chicken pox like me! What a bitch! Lucky he is not a girl, i can fathom how bitchy would he be if he is a gal!

Anway, a week later, which is now, i m near to recovery as the fever and score throat had gone down completely, and i m no longer on medication! I m now waiting for the poxes to dry up. The only thing that is killing me now is the awful diet!!! My parents were very strict with my diet. They were worried about the scars and thus they had made special arrangements for my diet to be simple and plain! Bread for both breakfast while lunch and dinner for kway teow/vermicelli soup diluted with a little light soya sauce with boiled fish, veggie and minced meat for dunno how many days!! Arggghhhh!!!

But heck, its going to be a week soon, i m going to drift away slowly from this hell diet!!

In the meantime, i have been spending my time ermmm, hmm on leisure. Hahaha!!! I'm aware that i should be doing some reading and seriously i swear that i really planned to read the whole pile of Singtel notes, the one on tallyman, the basics and stuff, but dunno why i seems to give up after browsing through just a few chapters of the basics in the morning on first day discharged from the comatose of the heavy medications. I dunno why, the info just cant seems to be seeped through my brain. I was bored!

Thus, in the end, i spent most of the time reading fictitious novels, watching stupid tv programmes and going online catching movies and shows!! LOL! Things that i always like to indulge myself in when i m free!

I finally get to read and finish A Leap Of Love, a novella by Catherine Lim. I have been yearning to read that ever since the release of the movie, The Leap Years. The novella was sooo poetically romantic!!! I hope to catch the movie soon!

I went online youtube to watch the 1st episode of Love or Bread (我的億萬麵包). The pace of the drama seems a bit slow and draggy. I don't like it at all. It's boring! Don't think i will continue watching the subsequent episodes. I still prefer Fated to Love You (命中注定我愛你). Freaking funny!!! The scenes containing xinyi's mum with ji cun xi are the best! A classic one!

Next, i also managed to catch Wild Child by Emma Roberts. Haha dunno why, recently i m more into these kind of teen drama. Sigh~ perhaps its because in slightly more than half a year time, i will be past the teen phrase...sob sob~~ getting old le.

The plot shared some similarities with The Naughtiest Girl in the School where the wild, unrestrained, spoilt Poppy Moore was sent to an english boarding school, Abbey Mount Institution, by her rich daddy, up to her horror, after a crazy intolerable stint of messing up with his dad's girlfriend. She was unhappy with the arrangements and was bent to show it by misbehaving and being rude. Her room-mates soon discovered her unhappiness and came together to help her to devise schemes to get her expel....

Emma Roberts looked odd in blond, i guess that's not her colour. It just doesn't suit her... She's more of a brunette. She look absolutely stunning in dark brown hair. But i think she is too skinny...should fatten up a bit more...will look much better...

The movie was rather tame, not wild at all. It was not as bitchy as Mean Girls but was entertaining enough for me to keep my eyes stay put in front of the computer screen for the whole 100 min duration.