Embarassing Moment

Oh gosh!!! I am such a moronic retard! I was caught in menses (red alert) during lesson. A large freaking patch of stain painted horribly at the rear, lower end of my skirt! Worse of all, it was James, who happened to be sitting right behind me, with nearly a whole row of guys, informed me about it!!! Ahhh!!! Can you believe it! This is so------embarrassing!!!

As our sch-u is of shades of light blue, there was really a striking contrast formed that was too impossible to feign a pretense! I was left with no choice but to go to the general office to borrow a skirt. Wah, i felt like an anorexic after browsing and flipping through the storage cupboard. All the waistband of the skirts available were so large, almost all were twice my size!

In the end, I went to the bookshop to purchase a bunch of safety pins before changing. The skirt was reeked with a sort of stench, it hung loosely around my hips area after buttoning and zipping up. I think with a little bit more of strength, i can just easily pulled it down!

Yuck! It was so uncomfortable and for the rest of the time, i was counting down for the end of school hours to rush home to change.

Haiz~ maybe this explains about the explosive outburst recently due to pms.

啊!!!!! 真是丢脸死了!!!

Vexed

I am in a thundering black BLACK bad mood this evening. It was already a not so fantastic day in the morning due to the new timetable slots. 2 periods of econs and 2 periods of the patience sucker pw at one go. During pw, received notice that we have to stay back in school till about 5 pm for some pw workshop. Damn! This sucks!

During the workshop, I was terribly hunger while my stomach growled in union together with my brain, which was protesting for food and sleep. I was also damned sleepy as i kept nodding off.

Finally, when everything is over, I was preparing to go home and damned i missed the 985 bus. All thanks to that bus driver from the sbs bus 174 driving at such a fucking slow speed and stopping at all stops when it was not even necessary! In the end, I took bus 157 home instead. This driver was also not any better! It took such a fucking long hour to reach my house plus my stomach was also not being helpful by increasing the frequency of the growling!!! DAMN!!!

When I reached home and saw what's for dinner, i was just simply pissed off. Everything is just not good today! Things got worse off when mum started to provoke my smouldering frustrations as I complained that the dinner served was not palatable to my appetite. Yea, I know its my fault for picking at the food but i don't really have a liking for the potato leaves veggie and chilli lala. Furthermore, the potato leaves veggie is served 2 in separate big plates, such a large portion that irks me off directly! Nasty-looking greens!!!

In a heated moment, I just stormed out of the flat angrily for dinner as what my dad suggested. "If you not happy, if you don't want to eat, you can just go and buy your own dinner!" Fine!

I seems to vent out some of my bottled frustrations and anxiety while walking quickly and stamping down stairs to the hub. Hmmm, seems like i have found a new way to manage my anger. Instead of cooping at home, taking a walk really brightens me up!! Went to have ice-cream at Mac after dinner to dissolve the remaining bad mood left in me....

This is so tiring....

等待的月台

在这周末, 由于校内大考刚结束, 我几乎整天都在当马铃薯. I have been slacking like a couch potato during this weekend. Though i m suppose to work on my pw, but i m really not in the mood to do so...

Out of a whim, i suddenly felt like re-reading this particular short story. And hence, immediately i went online to source for it and also the song adaptation.

I remembered that i was instantly captivated by the song when Ms Tew played the song for the class during one chinese enrichment lesson. She also handled us a printed version of the story. The starting melancholy tune followed by the narration of the story filled both my entire ears up to the brim!

Do listened to the song first before reading the story as the "feel" will be more intense.
And...here it goes...

The song adaptation: http://www.bluecabin.net/download/yi.mp3
Singer: 林慧萍
Title: 驿
Author: 林清玄

等待的月台

桃园火车站的候车室，时常坐着一位打扮齐整的中年妇人，手里抱着一个老式皮箱，游目张望，似乎在期待什么。

他先注意到的不是那妇人，而是皮箱，那皮箱的外表已经完全剥落了露出皮革粗糙的粒子，皮箱四周镶着红铜的边，他一眼就看出，那曾经是非常精致而且牢固的皮箱，但皮箱的那个时代仿佛已经消蚀了。

第一次见到妇人，是他高中的时候，每天夜里从桃园通车到台北补习，深夜十一点回到桃园，妇人总是准时地坐在候车室的木椅上，等待着的姿势，不安的眼神，端整的打扮，好像等待着某一位约好的人。

起先，他没有特别留意她，可是时间一久，尤其是没有旅客的时候，妇人就格外显得孤寂。有一天，他终于下定决心，在候车室等待那妇人离去，一直到深夜落雨，一直到凌晨一点，妇人才站起来，走到候车室的黑板前，用粉笔写着：“水，等你没等到，我先走了。英留” 那时他才知道，原来候车室长久以来的这则留言，是出自那个妇人。

英是她的名字，水呢？应该是一个男人了，是一个什么样的男人呢？像水一样地流走？

后来，车站的老人告诉他，妇人已经在候车室坐了二十几年了，有人说她疯了，可是她从不说话，也不知道真的疯了没有。有人说，曾看见她打开皮箱，箱里装的是少女时代的衣服。大部分的人都说，在二十几年前的一个夜晚，英和她的水约好在车站会面，要私奔到某个不知名的地方，可是叫水的那个男人却缺席了。

但是，英与水的故事真相却无人知晓，经过那样长的岁月，真实动人的质素也随一列列开过的火车逝去，成为人们窃窃的私语，到后来，甚至也没有人议论了。

他和叫英的妇人熟悉见过不少次面，才互相打着招呼，他感觉，英的微笑甚至是极老式的，廿年前的那种，还带着少女的矜持。他和英也只是如此，互相间并未说过一句话。他有时候并不立即回家，直到英在黑板上写：“水，等你没等到，我先走了。英留。”才踩着轻轻的步子回家。在路上他就想，那水的男子是多么幸福，竟可以获得如此深切的爱，而他又是多么可恨呀！

有一天，他回家的时候，不再看到英的影子，问了车站许多人，都不知道为什么。这风雨无阻的妇人，那一天，没有来。

第二天清晨，英残缺的身体被发现在铁道上，皮箱滚到很远的地方。

旅客留言板上有她的字迹，只改了几字：“水，等你三十年，我先走了。英留。”

他靠在留言板的墙壁上，用力捶打自己的心口，因绝痛的心酸而落下泪来，很长很长的时间，他回家的时候总先坐在英坐过的位置，感觉英的脉搏还在那里跳动。每次他走过车站，心口就像被刀子割过。

十几年后他父亲过世的时候，他才知道父亲的小名叫做“水”......

Phoneless...

Promos exams is finally over....

But....

I have lost my phone...My first handphone...yesterday. My hp accidentally slipped off from my skirt pocket and landed silently on the cushion bus seats of bus 56. I didnt realised it until i put my hands into my pocket for my hp to phone my mum to ask her what she wants for lunch.

I was careless and unobservant partially because i was really hungry and tired after taking the chemistry paper, my least favourite subject, and hence i was on a hurry to board down the bus and didnt notice the bulk in my pocket has shrunk...

Amusingly, one of schoolmates also lost her hp last fri, i never knew that my hp will also be lost shortly after her... 真是邪门! The only thing that seems consoling is that my hp cost just about $100+ when purchased, and it current market value might be around $50+ after depreciation, and hence whomever the petty thief who took the hp would not gained much either.

However, this is still my very first hp, and i can't even last it for 2 years! What the heck! I felt so retard....Even though my hp doesnt have much functions offered liked those latest phones, i was rather used to have it around as it also act as my watch and alarm clock in particular...

In future, i dont think i will ever get a hp that cost more than $200, just in case i lost it again...The feeling of losing things just sucks, it really dampen my spirits...

My Nokia 6101 hp